Seriously?

If I have to blog about how sometimes it snows in April one more time, heads will roll. Heads. Will. Roll. I just couldn't post the Prince song again. Fortunately, these cute buskers provided their original song of the same name for me to share.

Unfortunately, the "Gaiety Theatre" in this video is not the sadly lost Times Square male burlesque venue (made famous in Madonna's book Sex). Sigh...

Sometimes It Snows In April

A reminder that His Royal Badness is from Minneapolis where (sadly) sometimes it really does snow in April.



It's no coincidence that the Vikings' color is purple.

The North Star Leads To Freedom

Today was a Big Gay Day in Minnesota. Both the Senate Judiciary Committee and the House Civil Law Committee advanced a Marriage Equality bill that would legalize same-sex marriage.

In case you missed it, the announcement of the bill had the cutest press conference ever. I know the competition for "cutest press conference ever" probably isn't that stiff, but this is seriously adorable.

It also helped that this is the kind of witness the committee heard testifying for Marriage Equality. Former Minnesota State Representative (Republican, FYI) Lynne Osterman spoke eloquently and emotionally getting to the real heart of the issue: "Whether you believe in big government or small, do you believe in fair? Respectful? Equal? Is it ever okay to say, well, except for those people?"

The opponents of Marriage Equality, as usual, seem to have been bussed in from Crazy Town. I'll let Gawker explain the next video:

Speaking before the State House was one Mike Frey, a "concerned Minnesotan and father and a husband," who appears to be under the tragically ignorant impression that A) only married people have sex, B) unprotected vaginal sex cannot transmit HIV because the vagina has a "barrier" that protects it from such diseases, and C) the mere act of unprotected anal sex (which only gay men have) causes AIDS.

The bigots are really digging their own graves these days. As they say in Jesup: With enemies like this, who needs friends?

Chris Kluwe On The Colbert Report

Someone once asked my sister, "What would do you think your mother would say if you were on the Tonight Show?" Without missing a beat, my sister replied, "I don't like what she's wearing."
Well, my crush, Chris Kluwe, gave a great, smart, funny interview on The Colbert Report...

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...and my first thought was: He wore a stocking cap and flip-flops on national television?! I've come to grudgingly accept that some men no longer dress up for late-night television interviews, so I can live with (not like, but live with) the jeans and t-shirt; however, it is simply never acceptable to wear a ski hat and beach footwear at the same time. Keep in mind this was taped in January in New York City, so the flip-flops are doubly inappropriate. Maybe he's worried that people question his sexuality because he's such a vocal supporter of Marriage Equality, so he wore an outfit no self-respecting gay would be caught dead in.

Still, I can't stay mad at Kluwe for long because he introduced the phrases "lustful cockmonster"  and "beautifully unique sparkle pony" into the national debate on Marriage Equality.

My Pick In The Vikings Vs Packers Playoff Game

Who should I root for in the NFC wild card game? I've been a Green Bay Packers fan for the last five or six years, but I couldn't be called a die-hard. I was a Minnesota Vikings fan when I was growing up, and perhaps I should give them my loyalty again now that I am living in St. Paul. Before I cheer for either, I need to weigh the evidence. Anyone who has discussed sports with me will tell you that I take a lot into consideration in choosing favorites. Here's my score card.

Round 1: The Quarterbacks. Who Is Hotter? The 2012 Stats

Aaron Rodgers
Passer Rating: 108.0
Yards: 4,295
Touchdowns: 39
Completion Percentage: 67.2
QB Rating: 72.5
Passer Rating vs MN: 116.0
Passer Rating last game (vs MN 12/30): 131.8
Fantasy Football Average: 20.6
Fantasy Football Total: 329

Christian Ponder
Passer Rating: 81.2
Yards: 2,935
Touchdowns:18
Completion Percentage: 62.1
QB Rating: 53.8
Passer Rating vs GB: 83.3
Passer Rating last game (vs GB 12/30): 83.3
Fantasy Football Average: 11.3
Fantasy Football Total: 180
 



Winner: Aaron Rodgers. Thus concludes the statistical analysis portion of my assessment.


Round 2: State Political Leadership
Minnesota: Minnesota gets a big head start in this category because the Democrats are really members of the Democratic Farm Labor Party (DFL), and that's throwing down old-school progressive style. The state's delegation in the US House includes Michele Bachmann, the bat-shit crazy Tea Party queen with whom I am a little obsessed. However, it also includes Keith Ellison who is pretty great, and there are more members from the DFL than Republicans. Senator Amy Klobuchar and Governor Mark Dayton are both good liberals albeit a bit bland. I've saved the best for last: SENATOR AL FRANKEN. He's a rock star.

Wisconsin: If there's any politician that I love to hate as much as Bachmann, it's Paul Ryan, the US House delegate from Wisconsin's 1st district--I have him to thank for much of the Schadenfreude I experienced after the 2012 election. Overall, the delegation is a bit more conservative than the purple state should have. By far the brightest spot in Wisconsin politics is Tammy Baldwin, the first openly LGBT person in the US Senate (fyi: I'd love her even if she weren't a lesbian because her politics are fabulous). Of course, low point of Wisconsin politics is Governor Scott Walker whose anti-labor policies are not only unconstitutional but also hypocritical. As if that weren't bad enough, Walker also wants to engage in voter suppression.

Winner: Minnesota. Sorry, Tammy.

Round 3: The Quarterback Redux. Who Is Hotter? My Completely Subjective Opinion 
Please keep in mind, in all discussions of male hotness, the question is not: Would I sleep with him? As my friend Betty likes to remind me, that's a very low bar. Athletes' and other celebrities' hotness must be judged against a higher standard.

Aaron Rodgers

Rodgers is definitely good-looking in that aw-shucks, guy-next-door way--what some friends and I like to call a CYD (Cute, Young Dad).

However, he sometimes takes a turn for the douche. Backwards baseball caps are never okay. Unfortunately, being a douche does not necessarily make a guy unattractive to me.

 Rodgers certainly does, as my mother would say, "clean up nice".

Dude, I know it's the off season and you're on vacation, but come on. You're a professional athlete, and you're shirtless pictures should be much better than this.

Christian Ponder

Ponder is okay, I guess, if you like that classically handsome, all-American type. Oh... wait... I love the classically handsome, all-American type.

Even when he has a sadz which--let's face it--given his tendency for turnovers is often, Ponder is still gorgeous. He broods good.

I'm afraid I must deduct a few points for looking like a complete dorkasaurus off the field. Then again, looking bad in a suit can be forgiven...

...because this is how an NFL quarterback should look without his shirt on.

Winner: Christian Ponder. Call me, maybe? Don't worry, this isn't a gay thing, it's a football thing.

Round 4: Team Ownership

The Minnesota Vikings are owned by a bunch of rich guys. While I love that he principal owner has the unlikely and fantastic name of Zygi Wilf, it's not at all cool that the owners are trying to fleece fans with seat fees to build their new stadium.

The Green Bay Packers are the only non-profit, community-owned major league professional sports team in the United States. Their annual shareholders meeting may be the best thing ever.